Why does my dog follow me everywhere?

Yeah, your dog is your best friend. But does that really mean they need to follow you from the kitchen to the sofa to the bathroom and back to the kitchen?

This kind of behaviour may be charming or maddening, depending on who you ask. It certainly reflects a deep bond shared between pets and their parents. But it can also be a sign of anxiety and overdependence.

So why is your dog acting like your shadow? And should you do something to discourage them? Stick with us as we dive in.

The science behind your dog following you

To start, instinct and evolution are driving your dog's glue-like behaviour.

Dogs are descended from wolves. In fact, dogs and wolves are so closely related that they can breed and produce fertile offspring, which means they’re kind of the same species. In the wild, wolves stick close to their pack, and the pack leader is the key to their survival.

This pack mentality has been passed down to domesticated dogs. Despite your noted lack of fur and fangs, your pup may still view you as a pack leader—a beacon of guidance, security, and snack distribution.

No wonder they want to stay close to you.

Affection and loyalty

Your dog's clingy ways could be more than just instinct - they may just be expressing their affection and loyalty. When your dog follows you, they're showing that they enjoy your company and feel secure with you.

Perhaps you should take it as a compliment: your pup doesn’t just rely on you for basic needs like food and shelter. You offer them the same thing they offer you: emotional support.

Those who successfully establish such a nurturing dynamic—like consistent routines, positive reinforcement, and an intuitive understanding of their needs and body language—are often the ones who find themselves with a four-legged shadow.

Separation anxiety and overdependence

While it's heartwarming to have a furry follower, sometimes this behaviour can indicate issues like separation anxiety or overdependence. Separation anxiety in dogs is a very real concern, especially if your pup becomes distressed when you're not around. Signs can include excessive barking, destructive behaviour, or accidents in the house.

Separation anxiety is often a result of overdependence. When your dog relies too much on your presence, they can struggle to be alone for even short periods of time. This heightened state of anxiety is not only upsetting for your dog but can also lead to long-term behavioural issues.

An overdependent dog may not develop resilience or effective coping skills. They may even struggle to engage in normal dog behaviours, like exploring or resting, without their owner present. This reliance can also put a strain on the dog-owner relationship, as it can become difficult for owners to leave the house without worrying about their pet's reaction.

It’s vital to recognise signs of separation anxiety and overdependence early on, so you can take steps to correct the behaviours before they become severe.

They may need support—and perhaps a bit of training—to feel secure on their own.

Why your dog might choose you over other family members

Dogs often form a stronger bond with one particular member of the family. Several factors can influence this preference, including who feeds them, who spends the most time with them, who plays with them, or who provides training and discipline. The person who best meets the dog's needs for security, engagement, and routine is often the one who gets a furry follower. 

To encourage your dog to bond more evenly with other family members, involve them in your dog's care and activities. Let others feed, walk, and play with them for a change!

Training sessions with different family members can also help your dog develop a sense of trust and familiarity with everyone in the household. Remember, the goal isn't to lessen your bond with your pet but to help boost their socialisation and comfort with their whole human family.

How to encourage healthy independence in your dog

Start by creating a pleasant and safe space for them, like a cosy bed or a special area with their favourite toys. This helps your dog feel comfortable even when you're not around.

Methodical training is key. Begin by leaving your dog alone for short periods, then gradually increase the time. This teaches them that it's okay to be by themselves and that you’ll always return. To make these experiences positive, you can reinforce their good behaviour with treats and praise.

Remember, independence doesn't mean less love or attention. It's about helping your dog feel secure and happy, even in your absence. Regular exercise, playtime, and mental stimulation are also crucial in keeping your dog content and healthy, both physically and emotionally.

Here are some more tips to foster independence:

• Start small: Again, remember to leave your dog alone for just a few minutes at first. Gradually increase this time as they become more comfortable.

• Safe space training: Encourage your dog to spend time in their safe space even when you're home. This could be a bed, a crate, or a designated area with their toys.

• Interactive toys: Provide toys that keep them engaged while you’re away, like puzzle feeders or chew toys.

• Stay calm during departures and arrivals: Avoid overly emotional goodbyes or excited greetings. Keeping these moments low-key helps reduce separation anxiety.

• Practice routine: Dogs thrive on routine. Having a consistent schedule for meals, walks, and alone time can help them feel more secure.

• Positive reinforcement: Reward calm behaviour with treats and praise to reinforce that being alone is a positive experience. NEVER yell or punish them for undesirable behaviours.

• Avoid over-coddling: While it's tempting to give extra attention, especially when your pup seems sad or anxious, it's important to encourage some self-soothing and independence.

• Monitor and adjust: Every dog is different. Pay attention to their responses and adjust the duration and frequency of alone time accordingly.

Remember, promoting your dog’s independence can help them be their happiest, most emotionally healthy selves.

When to seek professional help for a shadow dog

Some pet parents might be content to have a furry shadow by their side. But if it’s just getting to be too much, or if your dog’s clinginess is accompanied by signs of distress, it might be time to consult a professional.

In particular, you might want to seek outside help if your dog is barking or whining excessively or showing signs of separation anxiety—like destructive behaviour—when you’re not around. A dog behaviourist or a certified dog trainer can offer tailored advice and training techniques to address issues of separation anxiety or overdependence.

Plus, a veterinarian can rule out any underlying health conditions that might be contributing to your dog's behaviour. If your dog's attachment is caused by an underlying health condition, dog insurance can help cushion the financial impact of treatment. 

Remember, seeking help is a sign of responsible pet parenthood. It shows your commitment to your dog's emotional and physical health. Helping your dog achieve independence doesn’t weaken your relationship—it strengthens it.